Publisher's Note

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Page added on March 29, 2013

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A Testimony of an Enlightened Youth

It was like a self-made curse as I look back at it now. Every thought was towards myself. Was it all my fault? I will never know the truth to that question, but from what I have done up until now might draw a map to the source. That which has happened to me had me afraid of doing certain things  that I once enjoyed.  Perhaps because I had focused on the thought of wanting to accomplish them rather than focusing on the inspiration that fuels the fire to achieve them.  Honestly, I had deceived myself with a lie (that I could do all things by myself) arrogantly pushing people and God away.  The enemy snared me in his trap after I happened to have done something very foolish and, simultaneously, out of pain of loss I desired to become more, then, I failed and fell from what I aimed at, and it only brought more pain and misery. So unfortunately my mind was lost in a void cluttered with noise after a year of listening to lies, and I managed to induce a preference to it while in a foolish state of mind. When something within was pressing against me that “this is wrong” I fought against it and made it out that “it feels right.” For a time I went with the latter but the confusion within me was so great that I could no longer help going with the former. So I understood why people do the dumb and foolish things they do, because they decide to disobey that voice or that feeling within them that tells them something is wrong. And the voice, that feeling in us is the consciousness we have all been born with, our God-consciousness. As I began cleaning up and disinfecting my mind from the lies I hungered for something that I hadn’t hungered for in a whole year — The Word. As I began reading daily, I saturated my mind in the word for months, then a cloud of warmth that was so great pulsed and stroked my forehead. So after a couple months of saturating my mind with the word, and a few days of warmth moving up and down my head, a verse came into my mind:  “This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.” (Hebrew 10: 16)

There was an immense joy within me when I discovered that this was literally happening. The word was active. The Lord made a new covenant with me. I didn’t understand why it was happening. Then, I realized my heart was hard. I had no compassion. I was selfish. I was angry. I was greedy. I lusted. I was complacent. I was so very and utterly hopelessly foolish. (A few days before, I repented deeply. I was sincerely sorrowful of my past life). In a few short months I was transformed after having lived hard and cold for many years. Then I wondered greatly what was the next verse, as my eyes scanned: Then he adds:  “Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more.” (Hebrews 10:17) – by Chris Dmitru




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