As we look back at our inauspicious beginning, we can’t help but feel the ground beneath us and in all celerity give out a sigh of relief, we have arrived. There is something Canada that beckons weary dreamers like ourselves and unsung it may be, the sweet mellifluous undertones gradually build into a beaming crescendo.

Our souls are laid bare on paper. Strangers stand stark naked before a promise, measured by merits of the past which may earn them a ticket at the gateway of the future, an irrevocable decision people make for a sense of security. Many opened their arms to us and bade us welcome, while some scoffed at our presence thinking that we had it all too easy. Some of us woke up early to catch the train in the coldest of winter carrying our children while our respective spouses who are coming off graveyard shift to meet us there, so they may take over where we left off. Some of us are bound to menial jobs in fear that we may be sent home. In the beginning everything was uncertain, but we dare braved it anyway for the sake of the next generation.

Family: A social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. ~Evan Esar

Over time, we lose our focus; we forget our primary objective for coming here. The bright lights of luxury take us away from the cold reality that we bury ourselves in. I’ve seen people burning daylight and coming home to empty chairs. Sometimes in trivial pursuit of money, we lose substance in the form of filial ties that bind us with our children. We squander most of our time worrying about other things and people who could care less whether we are happy or not. Our children, our pride and joy are brushed away because we would like to see more of us in them. Who are we to these wonderful humans? There is more to life than dedicating all the we are to prove ourselves here when what truly matters is who we are to our children.

We can fail in many things and with hope learn, but parenting is one thing where failure is not an option. How are we to resolve such travesty knowing full well that the dichotomy between working endless hours and managing our time with the children is somewhat difficult to reconcile. But we must have time, family time is important most especially for our young ones; regardless of how advance our technology is, there is just no substitute for being there for them. No amount of either money or success would suffice in your stead, every second of today matters and once your time is up, nothing can buy you back in their lives.

Much like the house that we obsessed about, that most of us come home to just rest, nothing more. What about them? Their eyes glued on their mobile devices and we are too absorbed in our own world while attending to our peers on Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat. They are growing before our very eyes and we are so preoccupied that we miss out; hence, the growing rift. Where are they as you read this?

The best room you can have in a house is that where regrets have nowhere to rest their heads. ~Erwin D. Maramat

It’s been stressful at work and you are trying to make things happen but leave work where it should be. Children are powerless in the adult world and they can’t handle the bigger children in the house. Plausibly, it’s hard to manage tantrums and I’m talking about you. One who teaches how to be patient must know how to exemplify patience through action, and you cannot achieve this by raising your voice like Gandalf. Describe what an orange is to you and ask your kid to describe it for you, that’s right, there is a difference, isn’t it? It’s not just maturity, it’s how limited the understanding of children are, without chicanery and subterfuge, we must show them the way and this my friend requires a great deal of time and that is why you and I must make time. I’m not saying you should spoil them either, all I am suggesting is be the adult in the house.

Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. ~Neil Postman, The Disappearance of Childhood (introduction), 1982

Now that we’ve tasted the pains of working ourselves to the bone, we fear the fate that awaits our children. In futile attempt to drum success in our children’s head, we sometimes forget that they are children. We brazenly take innocence from their hearts, so we can fill it with a bucket list of expectation. Make no mistake, there is nothing wrong with helping them realize their potential, but what is potential without character? What is success without conscience? What is reputation without a virtuous attitude? I have yet to come across someone intrigued about how I did in grade school. That day never comes, and I know it doesn’t for you too. Students who take medicine and graduate with honours will be called doctors, but so will the student who ranked last in class be called. One of this doctor will see you as a walking ATM, another with character will see you as a human that needs help. I understand that we invest in their education, but we ought to invest more in their character. Our children deserve a better world and in turn our world deserve better children.

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. ~Stacia Tauscher

Never lose sight of the fact that children grow up so quickly and you cannot buy them their childhood back, once it’s lost it’s lost forever. Fun fact: once you hit a certain age, you just keep growing old and while you are not there yet, all you have is now to share with the ones you love.

Growing up I was always told that I have to follow everything I’m told because I am just her daughter.  That she’s the one responsible to feed me, clothe me, send me to schoo and buy me everything I need.  Until finally I realized that it was like a dictatorship in our household, you’re not free until the matriarch of the house says so.  They say that age gap is the reason  why there is communication gap, but when can you be right when you are always wrong?  When will be you heard if it goes in one ear and out the other ear.  I found my life growing up very sad.  Until one day, I just decided to go.

I told myself that I will never be like her.  Because I believe that when you give birth to a child, you are given the gift of living.  You continue to live for that child, you want the best for your child but not to the point that you have to tell her what to do and what not to do.  I got three children of my own, and raised them as a sinle mother.  Now  that I’m getting to the age where my goal is to enjoy life to the fullest, I can say that no matter what hardship I’ve gone thru with my children, it was a gift of living so that I can see them  grow, glow and go.

Now I have 5 grandchildren and 1 more soon to come.  All I can say is that everytime a baby is born,  there is always that joy that pinch my heart.  It adds more years to the gift of living my life because my life doesn’t end with my children but will continue on to my grandchildren.  That is the gift of living…..we live to see that our children will grow to be responsible individuals when they reach maturity.  And we continue living to guide them and to give them advice when they need one.  I never patterned my gift of living with my mother because I do not believe that we have to treat our children as excess baggages but rather we should treat them with love, care and attention.  That for me is the real essence of the gift of living my life  because I believe that my real treasures are my children and my grandchildren.

“Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you.” – Robert Fulghum

The most rewarding experience one can ask for during one’s entire lifetime is becoming a parent. Giving birth to a child comes with several responsibilities as well as problems concerned with its upbringing. Finding the correct approach of raising a child can help it face and prevent any future unforeseen happenings with confidence, courage and determination.

Effective parenting helps in promoting good emotional and physical health in children. Children brought up under their parents’ gentle and kind care are in better position to protect themselves from any harm or injury in the future. Furthermore, good parenting will help children stay away from poverty and if so faced, they will know how to come out of it successfully. The best benefit of good parenting is that it optimizes a child’s potential, wherein the child grows up and becomes a productive member of society and country.

A basic premise of good parenting is one that takes many parents by surprise. It is that children learn attitudes, behaviours, lifestyle choices, prejudices, likes and dislikes, compassion and generosity by osmosis. They learn by watching and listening to their parents. Children, in most circumstances, do what their parents do. Parents own behaviour and attitudes are copied by their children, who look up to, admire, and mirror their parents ways of embracing life.

Parents, then, need to take seriously, what it is they are modeling since they are the greatest example for their children. Most parents want to raise children who are responsible to themselves and others. Individual responsibility is initially taught through practices that involve a child’s care of self (brushing teeth, grooming) and of their personal possessions (picking up toys and clothing). Eventually, responsibility expands within the family unit, then overflows into the school setting and community. At the same time, children will be observing the responsible habits and routines of their parents and their attitudes regarding these.

The greatest impact on a child’s acceptance of his own circumstances is the manner in which a parent models attitudes towards life. A child will be watching how her/his parents handle life’s ups and downs. Parents who provide a perfect scenario of life experiences for a child will not give opportunity for her/him to learn how to handle disappointment, how to really appreciate the good when it happens and try again when it doesn’t, how to develop resilience and determination and to press forward with optimism.

Children also benefit from faith-based beliefs modelled by their parents and grandparents as they search for guidelines for life choices and deeper meaning. Fostering a sense of spirituality in children helps expand their understanding that there is a width and depth in life beyond their limited childhood world.

Modelling a broader perspective benefits a child while he/she moves beyond her/his own family into the world of school. Parents can model attitudes of acceptance towards those who are different than the immediate family. As children begin to befriend others from various cultures and faiths backgrounds, their parents will either offer an attitude of tolerance toward differences in appearances, abilities and backgrounds or an attitude of prejudice.

Parental modelling is at its best when expressed through embracing the joy of living. Life has its ups and downs and is not free of disappointments and tragedies, however, a child can learn from her/his parents how to look for the positives life has to offer.

Parents also have the opportunity to expose their children to the fine arts, making these a part of family life. Children may eventually choose to personally participate in the beauty and self-expression that drama, music and art provide. A parent who loves to read will be modelling one of the greatest joys of living for her children.

Parenting is a “do what I do” endeavour. It calls one to be the best they can be for the sake of their children. It increases one’s integrity and honesty toward living.

“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.”

—Not really Charles Darwin

The basketball world had since evolved after Michael Jordan stepped off the court for good, but that has not deterred his airness from asserting his relevance to this day. He is brazenly vocal on how the best players of this generation would never measure up to the brute nature of the game in his time, perhaps that is true, but he also dismisses the fact that the he too will have difficulty thriving in this algorithm-driven era. He fails to recognize that he was a precursor of change; ushering a hybrid of athletes who are physically imposing and intelligent supported by a team of intelligent doctors, analyst, and supporting cast. Perhaps it’s his bitterness, but to be terse, it is his underestimation of the future that has turned him blind of the possibilities. He wasn’t very accommodating to change.

Change is disruptive. Emerging innovation pushes industries unable to cope with the times on the brink of extinction. Those who are adaptive, though spasmodic, earn the rite of passage.  A consummate understanding of what is to come pays dividends. Nokia was once a powerhouse of the mobile phone industry. They had it all in their hands, but what failed them was their underestimation of change. They were fully aware that the customer demands were shifting and yet complacency got the better of them which tragically led them to eventually lose ground in the race.

Change is hard, but necessary, and regardless whether you are willing to face it, the inevitable comes swiftly. Failing to convert cognizance to action often result in regrets. It is quite difficult to reconcile the dichotomy that exist between our perceived reality and reality since we are hardwired to a loop which explains why debilitating habits are hard to break.

Nostalgia sells. Whether you are willing to admit it or not, there is always a market for nostalgia. How else will you explain vinyl records? Or the re-emergence of old game consoles? Memories are being used as catalyst to reignite an already dead market. Not that there is anything wrong with making money, there is a reason why these things got scrapped, they were in the way of change.

The mere fact that our existence is fleeting, it is a must for us to maximize the use of our time. Zooming out, the vast expanse of the universe is expanding rapidly, although it still a theory, physicists state that our universe will reach a state of uniform value where it will be too cold, they call it the big freeze and sadly when it happens the timeline will have been stretched out to an extreme that making it seem that we didn’t even exist. What is even worse is that many are faithful to the tenet of being stagnant. Change is a risk worth taking.

The good old days belong to the present. Limiting beliefs tend to hold people down. I was born in a country where many people have insatiable affinity to superstition. Instead of going to a hospital they turn to quack doctors and at this day and age where you can access Facebook and Instagram anywhere in the world, they choose to live in this darkened state. There are those who still cling on to ignorance, refusing to recognize women as equal to men; there are those who believe that they are entitled to have slaves; there are those who still believe that the pigment of their skin makes them superior over others; there are those who still brutally take innocent lives because of their denomination; there are those who refuse change, because change will no longer tolerate the egocentric.  The past is long gone, and much of today is wasted because we tend to dwell in the past.

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”
― Rob Siltanen

I once read a book entitled ‘Who Moved My Cheese’ by Kenneth Blanchard Ph.D. which as an allegorical account of two humans and two rats who found a place in the maze abundant in cheese, and that one day, the supply cheese was gone for good. It recounts the tale of two humans unable to cope with change, and although realization came in late one of the protagonist decided to move on in hopes of finding another station that might have cheese. The book is a bestseller and heavily panned with criticism because from another vantage point, it is an intimation of undermining proletariat to acquiesce. There were companies circulating the book to quell the mood of despair when downsizing employees and there’s this bit of contrasting humans with rats. However, it also conveys a strong message: we must be open to change and be willing to change, so we could make it to the next level.

Pack up your bags and go. We all have our respective baggage, whether concrete or abstract. We love to litter our lives with things and we hoard them. We plant ourselves thinking someday we would grow into Baobabs, but we are humans, we were meant to explore and discover the opulent salubrious wonders of the world. Make no mistake, it’s wonderful to have things in life, but it’s better to live your life. Whether a casket or urn, it will be too crammed to eternally house you and a mobile phone, let alone a house, so this fever of endless pursuit of junk is truly an unhealthy obsession

I’m not fast, you’re just moving too slow.

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

We can’t wait for change to happen, we must make it happen by being the change that the world so desperately needs. You can’t hope to change people either, but you can also inspire them to see the importance of change. There is always that misconception that we are living in fast-paced world, there are still those who are left wondering; clueless as to what had happened to the world they know. There is no cause to be alarmed, one just need to have a deeper understanding of managing life and time. It is times like this that we should espouse change as an impetus to propel us forward, it’s a great time to be in shape in all aspects of life. Frankly, I’m overweight and I am determined to change that, so I can run freely to pursuit beauty of our ever-changing lives. Wear your trainers, let’s go!

“Don’t spare me a change, let change spare us.”

― Erwin D. Maramat

Long before “Mother’s Day” was conceived, the month of May in ancient Greece and Rome, dedicated to pagan goddesses connected to fertility and springtime (Artemis and Flora). This, combined with other European rituals commemorating the new season of spring, led many Western cultures to view May as a month of life and motherhood. In fact, Long before “Mother’s Day” was ever conceived, the modern celebration is closely related to the innate desire to honour maternity during the spring months.

Mother’s Day is a special day of celebration honouring the Mother of the family, as well as motherhood and the influence of mothers in society. On this day children give cards and presents to their mother as a sign of their love, their appreciation and gratitude. Knowing my mom loved plants, flowers and religious articles, those were things I pampered her with on Mother’s Day.

My mother passed away last year at the very ripe age of 98. She truly lived a long, fulfilling life. At her funeral last June, 2017, I delivered my emotional tribute to her. I opened my eulogy with this: my mom was an ordinary, strong woman who did extraordinary things during her lifetime. First of all, she was a woman of great faith, deeply believed in the power of prayers. For decades, she was very devoted to Our Mother of Perpetual Help, the great intercessor, the perfect Christian.

My mom lived a true Christian life, manifested her faith with actions. Her generosity, kindness, love and hospitality were boundless. She opened our home in Manila to many people-kins, relatives and town mates who needed a place to stay, either while pursuing careers or just visiting the city. Her hospitality was impeccable.

Etched in my mind was her demonstration of her generosity and kindness.  During my teens, she hired women to do laundry and iron our clothes each weekend of every month. Besides the daily wages she gave them, she fed them at breakfast, lunch and gave them snacks. In America, she did the same to Mexican helpers she hired as cleaners and gardeners. She provided them, too, extra clothing and food to bring home.

From the time my mom and dad started a family in 1936, my mom was a stay-home mom in her entire life. Although short of financial resources, she had other resources to her disposal when my siblings and I were going to college. She said, “ I don’t mind losing my inheritance for as long as all my children can secure a college education, the education I never had.” That was one of the greatest sacrifices she had to face and endure- to lose several of her land inheritance and assets.

In her nineties, I can’t believe she could still sing Latin hymns like Tantum Ergo, O Salutaris Hostia and others. I asked her how she learned them. She said she used to sing in the choir of our St. Stephen Parish and for the decades of devotion she made to Our Mother of Perpetual Help in Baclaran. At times when I visited her, we sang together classical Filipino serenades that my papa taught her and me like “Pakiusap”and “Madaling Araw.”

Remarkably, my mom could recall lines from the Proverbs section of the Bible. On top of her head, she would blurt out, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Remember the Lord in everything you do.” I thanked her for reminding me always to keep believing and trusting the Lord and to keep believing in myself. Another favourite line of hers is: “be generous and you will be prosperous. Help others and you will be helped.”

My mom wasn’t perfect…she was a human being but she did her very best. My own children used to accuse me of being overprotective to them.  I used to accuse my mom the same. I admit there were times we can’t seem to see eye to eye to each other. She was hard on me but deep in my heart I knew she loved me. She was after my well-being. She was concerned about my future. She wanted the best for me and my siblings. I recognized that….I learned that…..I understood that.

You have to wonder; did we forget to pay our season renewal because it’s taking time to download spring? The cold season has overstayed its welcome. Its long pale slithering fingers stretch over days with no end in sight. Our world is plunged into eternal winter, and that’s not even a hyperbole. Occasionally, we’d get a sense of the flickering rays of spring, but our hopes are dampened by the morning downpour of snow that seem to gleefully mock us as we shovel our driveways. I throw fits every night as I skim through weather updates that often ends up in disappointment and deep sighs the minute my consciousness leaps out of sleep. It’s not that I have anything against winter, but it’s like a bratty sibling that won’t let go of the game pad when it’s spring’s turn to play on Xbox One.

Winter goes beyond the physical world it extends as a phase in our very lives as we eagerly look forward to basking underneath the sun. All we can do is enjoy it, that is why winter activities were invented lest we are stuck in the living room wasting away as we stream reruns on Netflix. After a long weekend of reflection and prayers I was hoping warmer weather will step foot in the new week, but all I got were messages on Facebook about poultry day and Bugs Bunny’s birthday which I thought as strange because they coincide with Easter Sunday. But what exactly, can we take away from this? If we cling onto hope and faith long enough, we would find ourselves in the clear eventually.

The oil of hope makes life’s machinery run smoothly. ~James Lendall Basford (1845–1915), Sparks from the Philosopher’s Stone, 1882

The sooner we believe that there is more to life than the woes our present situation has held us, the sooner we’ll be on the path to less resistance. When we think of winter, many of us think of the bitter cold that bears no mercy. However, it’s a time of the year that does what it does best—be the best winter it can be, and we cannot ill-afford to curse it for its nature. We ought to embrace it with sincerity and live the moment accordingly. When life throws you lemons, you don’t throw the lemons back, you put up a lemonade stand and generate profit. In 1891, peach baskets turned winter in the most exciting times, a hundred years later LeBron James is destroying the breakaway rim, thanks to James Naismith. Life isn’t perfect otherwise it would be boring, it requires—you’ve guessed it right—you, me, them, and us to pitch in. If life were perfect it wouldn’t be here, but by faith, hope, and love; the way we put meaning in our lives would ultimately determine if we deserve a golden ticket to get there.

Let the resurrection joy lift us from loneliness and weakness and despair to strength and beauty and happiness.  ~Floyd W. Tomkins

As hopelessness lay siege in our hearts; despair not, for nothing lasts forever, nothing, not even the pains of now. Most of the time, we get caught up in a situation we think would never end and we immediately dismiss the thought that things are bound to get better and for some they wade in the trap for comfort, no longer yearning to get better. An inspiration we can draw out from the holy week is persistence to overcome the impossible which is death in this case. It’s unforgivable to let hope wither away. Each of us were given respective gifts to help us out, but as always, we would rather see them in the hands of others because we are in love with the result and never the process. There are times we fall in pit with rungs and rope lying around, we fail to see the creation of ladder, and as we succumb to our circumstance, we curse everyone outside the hole. We would rather take the risk of stagnation than the risk of liberation. This is winter.

He who marvels at the beauty of the world in summer will find equal cause for wonder and admiration in winter…. In winter the stars seem to have rekindled their fires, the moon achieves a fuller triumph, and the heavens wear a look of a more exalted simplicity. ~John Burroughs, “The Snow-Walkers,” 1866

We should never take our sight off the positive things even in times of trouble. It is when our maturity is tested, and our wisdom is needed. We can’t be exclusively strong in days that have no need for it, it is in times of drought that we must channel the storm in us for growth to have a fighting chance. In Greek mythology; Prometheus stole fire from Zeus and gave to mankind. In retaliation Zeus sent out Pandora who was carrying a jar (not a box) bearing the label, ‘Don’t open stupid. Contains evil and allergens. Seriously, take your hand off the lid!” Pandora, curious and all, opened the lid and unleashed despicable evil and bacon-flavored bacon into the world. In the end, hope leapt out of the jar, assuring Pandora that there is a chance for mankind, so we are taking that chance to make something of ourselves.

The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination. ~Marian Zimmer Bradley

Spring is upon us (with hope), and as the remains of the cold days thaw and flowers begin to bloom and the birds that flew south are back from a beautiful summer somewhere package vacation, we can’t help but be thankful, not because winter is over, but because it made sunny days ahead meaningful and worth enjoying every minute until winter comes back in full circle making the new sweater we bought in a summer sale worthwhile.

Awake, thou wintry earth -
Fling off thy sadness!
Fair vernal flowers, laugh forth
Your ancient gladness!
~Thomas Blackburn, “An Easter Hymn”

“Spring has sprung,” is a popular adage which means spring has arrived. We see trees start to sprout, birds around are singing, temperatures are surely at a pleasant range. Everything seems to have new life. After a bleak very cold winter, Spring is a time of great hope.

As spring and hope are part of us, we are just as much a part of spring and hope. Spring is that spirit of HOPE-that time after the dark, bitter cold, raging storms and gloomy months. It comes a little at a time. Sometimes it comes before we even see it. Even when the darkness of winter still looms, Spring is underfoot.

Spring is the plant pushing up through the slowly warming up soil to eventually break the ground and become a flower. Spring is hidden inside the bark of trees preparing to become a bud that will bear fruit. Before we ever see it – spring is there. The spirit of spring is hope.

Where does hope come from? In true honesty, I don’t know. At times, though, I feel it’s like the tiny flicker of a candle in the dark. How it gets there and where it comes from, I leave that to greater minds. But I certainly know this -it comes.

Cicero once said, “ while there is life, there is hope.” Since ancient times, ailing or dying individuals would believe that so long as someone or something ailing is alive, there is hope for recovery. Today, it is also applied to inanimate matters. For example, a company would survive several previous recessions; while there’s life, there’s hope.

In some ways, human beings are “ prisoners of hope, “ going around discouraged and defeated. They live in anger, resentment and bitterness rather than hope. At times we encounter adversities and hardships. None of us enjoy tough times. With faith we fill our hearts with hope. We can stay filled with hope knowing that someone bigger than ourselves will restore good things back to us. While things could change in an instant, we should never give up hope.

Consuelo (Chit) E. Munar is the past president of the University of the Philippines Alumni Association (UPAAA) 2012-2015. Currently, she is the Chairperson of the Stewardship Committee at the Holy Trinity Catholic Church. She also chairs the Catholic Women’s League Committee on Legislation and Resolutions at Holy Trinity Parish CWL Council.

The day of hearts is long gone and so they say, but, each day is a perfect opportunity to love.

Some of us were born inside a kaleidoscope that weaves endless dreams and fairy tales, and fairy tales is all we had, unaware that one day our pristine spirits will leak out into a world contaminated with greed and hatred—inhospitable to life and innocence. We were endeared with the catchphrase “happily ever after” and were eager to find love, only to find as soon as part ways with our innocence, we realize that it’s not all bed of roses, it comes with thorns, bugs and sometimes horticulturist included, and that love and heartache are drinking buddies that crash into our parties uninvited. Both work together to get us woozy with hope and grief to bring symmetry in our once young world. Love used to be about flowers and poetry, but just as the pilot in Antione de Saint-Exupéry’s Little Prince, so too are we brainwashed into thinking that beauty and success should be tattooed on our flesh for us to deserve love.

For those of us who rely on our charms, we opted to talk our way into things. Words gracefully glided on our tongues and leapt into the heart of another, until out of the blue, science proposed those words be decrypted into a reasonable language called algorithms, in hopes that they may understand what we truly feel, so they can sell us a self-help book on how to love as if the feeling were just invented (note that I used were and not was). They subjected love under a microscope in hopes that they may find the ultimate key, but love is always complicated, because of it’s simple then we cannot call it love.

In the beginning, Aphrodite brings people together, names of strangers that used to be unthought of grow into the sweetest sounds that our mouths can utter and the clamour that once filled the air is muted and the storms within are silenced. When eyes meet, people are caught in an event horizon where time slows down stretched into what seems to be an eternity. Hearts race, palms profusely sweat, legs tremble, cheeks flush—people are reduced to ripe tomatoes. It’s just a matter of time before couples find themselves lounged in a couch watching ‘The Notebook’ or ‘Sleepless in Seattle’ and of course, ‘Fifty Shades of Dorian Grey.’

Love is intoxicating and once we get drunk, we never want to get sober. When paths get intertwined, we reach an agreement to be as one. Love is a union, not only of space, but of uniqueness and numbers. Often, we talk about how differences make relationships difficult to manage, but rarely do we acknowledge those differences as distinctions that may ultimately bring color and character to our relationships. Those unique attributes are what should be celebrated, and they are by those who are truly in love. From the union, our souls become kindred; our thoughts infused; our hearts beat in unison and we become a blend of warmth confined in the arms of our beloved. We seek to share the same sunsets and the promise of a new in the breaking dawn.

People go to great lengths or the ones they love. They are willing to risk it all. Talk about altruism—a true measure of love’s power, think about Jack who embraced the role of human popsicle, so that Rose may live to grow old, so she can throw back an expensive gem into the sea. That’s the beauty of love, people will wholeheartedly sacrifice everything

We breathe and relish every moment, until our ties get tested and our virtues tampered. Unrealistic expectation gets in the way of things. Some of us succumb to overheated imagination as we slip into a pop culture induced stupor that a knight in shining armor riding a Lamborghini with a humungous bank account will come to sweep us off our feet and we seek it in our relationships only to find that the truth is more modest. Modest as it may be, we learn the value of resiliency when we meet that someone who makes getting up worthwhile. To a fault, we try defining romance the way they are laid to us by those movies we watch. We impose our wants and we if we don’t get are fill, we tend to get frustrated.  We expect so much of our partner that sometimes we fail to recognize that as much we want to be rescued, our salvation has drowned ahead of us.

If you are thinking of raising a family, you must raise a relationship. No relationship is easy, and it’s bound to be that way. This much you can expect, conflict is there to be resolved and considered a breakthrough any relationship. It’s not about working something out, it’s about working together and making things work. It may not always go your way, but if you are in a relationship with your ego more than you are with your partner, think again. This is the greatest excuse that people make, at the first sight of trouble, they immediately bail or jump ships thinking a new relationship is the cure bringing the same attitude; the same norm; the same expectation, only to find they are bewitched by the same problems not realizing it’s the same baggage that they were tagging all along. We are sold on the idea that there is a perfect relationship, but there is never any and beautiful stories that end well are the result of processes that were managed well through understanding, maturity and compromise.

In every fairy tale there is an antagonist, be it an evil villain or heartbreaking situations. There are monsters to be slain, and sometimes, not all the time but sometimes, Mr. Prince Charming or Ms. Damsel in Distress turns out to be the destroyer of worlds and what’s scarier is that we don’t recognize that it is really us. If we could learn to share our openly share our lives to our loved ones we might just end up with a happily ever after.

“One tree can start a forest; one smile can begin a friendship

One hand can lift a soul; one word can frame the goal

One candle can wipe out darkness; one laugh can conquer gloom

One hope can raise your spirits; one touch can show you care

One life can make the difference, be that one today.”

It takes One thought, One spark and One action to manifest something of significant value that impacts not only one person but a community, a society and even the world. The rippling effect of One is truly contagious. Take the case of a random act of kindness. The power of kindness should never be underestimated in order to change the way people see and experience the world. Being kind can change someone’s life.

In any form or shape, we all struggle. We all stress. The good news is we also all love. Kindness does really start with one – one person, one act, one city, and one movement with one goal in mind: to make our world a kinder place one act at a time.

There are scientifically proven benefits of being kind. Kindness increases:

1         Love hormone – Witnessing acts of kindness produces oxytocin (referred to as Love Hormone) which aids in lowering blood pressure and improving our overall health.

2         Happiness – According to a 2010 Harvard Business School survey of happiness in 136 countries found that people who are altruistic – in this case, people who are generous financially, such as with charitable donations – were happiest overall.

3         Energy – In one study reported, half of the participants feel stronger and more energetic after helping others; many also reported being more calm and less depressed with increase feeling of self-worth.

4         Pleasure – According to research from Emory University, when you are kind to another person, your brain’s pleasure and reward centres light up, as if you were the receiver of the good deed-not the giver. This phenomenon is called the “helper’s high.”

5         Lifespan – people who volunteer tend to experience lesser aches and pains. Giving help to others protects overall health twice as much aspirin protects against heart disease. People 55 and older who volunteer for two or more organizations have an impressive 44% lower likelihood of dying early.

Everyone wants to live in a world where everyone looks out for each other where kindness is the norm and that every one helps out in anyway they can.

In John’s gospel 8:12, Jesus declares “ I am the light of the world.” What did He mean? Light is a common metaphor in the bible. It symbolizes righteousness. Jesus used light as a picture of good deeds. In declaring Himself as the Light of the world, Jesus was claiming that He is exclusively the source of spiritual light. When Jesus said, “ whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life,” the allegory he used speaks of the light of His truth, the light of His word and the light of eternal life.

When we take a candle into a dark room, its light dispels darkness. Likewise the Light of Jesus has to be taken into the darkness of sin that engulfs the hearts and souls of those who are not following Him. That is the condition behind having this Light – that we follow him. If we do not follow Him, we will not have this light, this truth and eternal life.

Nelson Mandela said, “education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” Mandela was a great believer in education and life-long learning. He became the first black president of South Africa. He saw education as part of the key to winning the struggle against apartheid.

Likewise, former US First Lady Michelle Obama declared that education changed everything for her – opening doors to opportunities she never could have imagined. To her, she declared that “ education meant freedom and empowerment; the chance to fill my potential and make my voice heard in the world.“ And it breaks her heart that currently there are millions of girls across the globe who don’t have a chance to attend school.

Michelle and Barack Obama recognize the kind of impact educating girls can have – not just for them and their families, but for their communities and their countries as well. Girls who go to school marry later, have lower rates of infant and maternity mortality. Girls who are educated also earn higher salaries – 10 to 20 percent more for each additional year of secondary school. And sending more girls to school and into the workforce can boost an entire country’s economy. So the former First Lady started an initiative to help more girls worldwide attend school thru the Obama Foundation.

Kindness starts in all of us, endeavouring to make strides towards building a kinder world. We can live everyday working to make kindness effortless and have selfless acts be the norm.

Consuelo (Chit) E. Munar is the past president of the University of the Philippines Alumni Association of Calgary (UPAAA) 2012-2015. Currently, she is the Chairperson of the Stewardship Committee at the Holy Trinity Catholic Church. She also chairs the Catholic Women’s League Committee on Legislations and Resolutions of Holy Trinity Parish CWL Council.

The day of hearts is upon us soon, and undoubtedly, everything will be saturated with articles on love. If anything, anyone who is selling flowers, chocolates, jewelleries, and lavish gifts to exploit professing love will be on board to cash in on the Valentine’s day bandwagon. So, what makes people tick when it coming up with profitable ideas? That my friend will be the focus of this article.

Heroes are perceived as immortals; ever graceful in their field of expertise, and spectators applaud them for their flawlessness and when blemishes surface, they are condemned for their imperfections. Everyone associate success with luck, but what they fail to see is that they are infatuated with the result and not the process—the creative process.

The Importance of Being Earnestly Creative

“Necessity is the mother of invention and the nagging wife of creativity.”

—Erwin D. Maramat

There are far too many reasons to elaborate and stress on the importance of creativity. The future may belong to everyone. However; it is something designed and brought to life in the thinking lab of the creative. Sometimes when life itself is being a jerk, it hands out the opportunity that calls for people to be creative—to think outside the box with the intent of selling the box and not sleeping on it by a smog-friendly street.

We are now living in a world that embraces creativity and thinking, this was not always the case. Creativity is supposed to make lives better, it encourages people to see beyond existing standards in hopes of elevating our lives, people in the past where burned at the stake for thinking out loud. Copernicus who out of curiosity found out the world is round pretty much kept it to himself as not to rouse anger from blithering idiots. Parents used to bully their kids into submitting into the ideals of a money-driven planet, but now everyone is being encouraged to nurture the creative gifts of our children, after all, we are putting our bets on this generation to save the world from itself. Jokes aside, our resources are dwindling, and this planet which was once a well-oiled machine is becoming more inhospitable to life and unaccommodating to rapid growing population of Instagramers.

Many of the greatest things that now exist just spurned from imagination, and yet creative thinkers have been frowned upon by skeptics who are attached to their comfort zones, until they are proved wrong and until companies find the bi-product of creativity will surely put a hefty amount money in their pockets.

Creativity has helped people weather numerous bouts of ups and downs. It serves as inspiration for people to navigate around roadblocks that stand between them and their dreams. In the end, creativity is often exploited, but on a lighter note it also a means for people to be true to themselves.

Can’t Buy Me Love, Neither Creativity

No matter how people try, creativity can’t be taught. There is a fine line between knowing and creating. It doesn’t mean knowing how to use a paint brush means one is automatically creative. There are millions of musicians who are technically gifted, but when asked to write a meaningful song, you are bound to find that only those who have sense of creativity stand out above the rest.

When I was a second grader my teacher had a glimpse of the future when she asked us to draw creative ideas. We were divided in groups and after thirty minutes we handed our work to her and the whole class was asked to explain their respective drawings. The group I belonged to presented a drawing of a device that sent out messages of what is comparable to mobile phone of today and drawings of cups of food that only required hot water for instant meals. She dismissed our ideas as being outlandish and praised the other group who drew an underwater clinic. It’s not to say that she was stupid which I thought she was, but just because one cannot perceive a creative idea doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea. In a video of a speech delivered by renowned astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson, he cited a contrived example of an employer who was conducting an interview of two candidates who were both asked what the height of the spire is of the building where the interview is being held. The first candidate gave the quick answer; 150 feet tall, as he had majored in architecture and had memorized how tall the spires were. The other candidate was asked the same question and admittingly he said that he didn’t know the answer but excused himself out of the office to conduct measurements and came back with an approximation of how tall the spires were. Dr. Tyson said he will hire the latter as he thought that person knows how to use the mind in a way not previously engaged. The moral of the story is that people underestimate the power of creativity and analytics in favor of proven facts and methods which has garnered the approval of authorities.

Creativity is inspired by the world outside and it is something that we teach ourselves and the most others can do is share techniques and methods.

Nurture the Nature

Don’t get stuck in a pattern. Although there is nothing wrong with being dependent on what is given; it is always to our benefit to think, create, and fail. Yes, fail, because that’s what motivates people to overcome limitation. When one is creative, one is bound to share the pains of failure, but that’s how we learn and that’s what makes success meaningful and creations worth the while. It what’s make human sapient, rather than being spoon-fed and being grateful for deliberate mindlessness.  Creativity is most of the time about originality. It speaks volume of how thinking can be a powerful tool to change the landscape of any industry.

Dreams are conjured by the imagination and once the blueprint is defined we become engineers of our destiny.